Sunday, March 3, 2013

Sunny side up please...

When I found out I was having twins my husband Paul was in South Africa. I waited two whole weeks for him to come home so I could hand him an ultra-sound shot of his first child, and then of his second. Once he recovered a bit I waited about ten mississippi's to yell the following words...
"AND IF YOU THINK FOR ONE SECOND THAT PLASTIC SURGERY IS NOT IN MY FUTURE YOU MY FRIEND ARE DRUNK".

My kids are now five and they are the absolute best thing I have ever done (or will do).  I have 0 regrets carrying them, or feeding them, I will however say this - the little boogers left a hot mess in their wake. A train wreck of a stomach and boobs that resemble two sacks of wet garbage.
I work with a personal trainer, which has been great for certain areas, but the bottom line is - unless gravity lets up a bit, or I figure out how to DIY a zipper into the fanny pack of skin I now get to carry around (therefore making it useful) I will be stuck with a body that makes me unhappy forever. 

So, tomorrow at 7:45am I will be getting a reduction, a lift and abdominoplasty. It has been a long time coming, and I am a little nervous (and certainly not looking forward to a few weeks of discomfort) but also super stoked that I actually just went ahead and booked it. 
I am telling everyone because A. that is just how I roll and B. who is going to believe that I bench pressed my way to size C perkies? Nobody is that dumb.
I will keep you posted on the details as I go along. If you have any questions about these surgeries or the recovery etc. please feel free to ask.

What I have learned so far...

Plastic surgeons are not big on the high five. When explaining to your children what you are about to do you probably shouldn't yell "BECAUSE YOU TOTALLY WRECKED MY BOOBS"! it might come up later in a therapists office. I have an awesome and helpful family. My husband is super happy with me the way I am, and is in mourning a little this week - which just proves that I did marry a really awesome dude.
And finally, in your initial consult if your surgeon suggests that "sometimes when you renovate your kitchen the living room ends up looking a bit shabby as a result" he is fishing for more surgeries. Yes, this is how I decided to go full meal deal - but be careful, from what I understand it is a slippery but short slope to Joan Rivers town.


Wish me luck, talk soon...xo

eggs by g4ll4is 

9 comments:

  1. Thinking of you - brave, honest woman! Hope it's a speedy recovery. Oh and get a bell! Enjoy your down time and milk it for all it is worth.

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  2. Rachel! You are beautiful either way! Sending you lots of healing energy! Sharon

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  3. Break a leg...or a boob not sure what the sying is for this one....My mom had a tummy tuck done back in the day so I had no idea what I was looking at when I started life drawing classes, a buddy had to tell me how babies were born (I was 16)...I also had an issue growing up where I watched a crazy amount of surgeries on tv so I know the marvelous things they can do with left over breast tissue (an internal support like a bra)but I have also seen horrible things done to testicles:( anyhoo miss ya hope all goes well

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  4. I was just reading your blog and saw that you are in Orono. Cool, our farm is in Kirby. I hung out in Orono when I was a child. Beautiful area.

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  5. ha! i love your honesty! i feel the same way...but i only had to do it with one child:\
    hope the surgery went well!
    x

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  6. Good on ya. Here's to no longer picking your boobs up with your finger tips...wish I had booked an appt.

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  7. I read your entire blog this weekend, while my baby was sleeping in my arms. I love your stories and the way you tell them. I love your photographies, they are beautiful and sensitive. I hope your operation went well :) best wishes for the healing process

    H
    Xx

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  8. thank you for all the lovely wishes! hello to old friends, and welcome to new...all is going well so far, super duper tired of bedrest - which is crazy because i have spent a lot of time thinking that would be so awesome for the past five years. love the love peeps, xorach

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